A manager comes to HR and says: “He refused to do what I told him. That is insubordination. I want him out.” In my 21 years in HR I have heard this sentence many times, and in most cases the first half was not quite true and the second half was too early.
In this guide: what insubordination is and is not, examples, the step-by-step response for a manager and HR, a sample written warning, and a free written warning builder.
One note before we start. This is HR practice, not legal advice. What counts as misconduct, which steps are required and when you may dismiss differ from country to country — check your local labour law and your own policy first.
In this guide: what insubordination is and is not, examples, the step-by-step response for a manager and HR, a sample written warning, and a free written warning builder.
One note before we start. This is HR practice, not legal advice. What counts as misconduct, which steps are required and when you may dismiss differ from country to country — check your local labour law and your own policy first.
What is insubordination at work?
In everyday HR usage, insubordination is a deliberate refusal to follow a clear, reasonable and lawful work instruction from a person who has the authority to give it. Three things have to be true at the same time:
- There was an instruction. Specific, about the job, given by the employee’s manager or another person with that authority. A hint or a wish in passing is not an instruction.
- The employee understood it. They knew what was expected and by when.
- The employee refused — in words (“I am not doing this”) or by knowingly not doing it.
What is not insubordination
This is the list I go through with a manager before anything is written down:
- The employee disagreed — and did the task. Arguing with a decision is not refusing it.
- The employee asked questions or asked to change the deadline.
- The employee did not understand what was wanted. That is a management problem, not a discipline problem.
- The employee cannot do it. No skill, no tools, no time. That is a performance issue, and the tool for it is training or a performance improvement plan.
- The instruction was unsafe or illegal. Refusing it is not misconduct.
- The work is outside the job and the employee believes it breaks the contract. In that case the employee can file a formal complaint against the supervisor — a grievance — and it is handled by the grievance procedure, not by a warning.
- The “bad attitude” appeared right after a complaint. In my course I give this case: a manager wants to fire an assistant for a bad attitude, and last week she complained about pay to her colleagues. In the US that kind of talk is protected by law. The timing tells you to stop and check.
Insubordination examples — and look-alikes
These are typical situations for illustration, not real cases.
Insubordination:
Insubordination:
- A shift lead is asked in writing, twice, to send the weekly stock report by Friday. Both times he answers “I am not doing this” and sends nothing.
- An employee is told to hand a client over to a colleague before a planned leave, says “no” in front of the team and leaves without the handover.
- A specialist is told to stop using a personal account for client files, agrees in the meeting and knowingly keeps doing it.
- An employee says in the meeting that the new process is a mistake — and follows it from Monday.
- A driver refuses to take out a vehicle with a known brake fault.
- An accountant refuses to backdate a document.
How to deal with insubordination: step by step
The approach I teach is called progressive discipline. I explain it with football cards: first a word from the referee, then a yellow card, then a second yellow, then red. These are steps of growing weight that give the employee a fair chance to fix the problem. In the US it is company practice, not a requirement of federal law; in other countries a formal procedure may be mandatory. Either way, if you write steps into your policy, you have to follow them.
Step 0. Check the instruction and ask why. Was it clear, reasonable, part of the job, and given by the right person? Then ask the employee one question and listen: “What is getting in the way?” Quite often the answer moves the case to the previous section.
Step 1. Verbal warning: a private talk. The manager names three things — the standard, the facts and the fix. And “verbal” does not mean unrecorded: the manager writes a dated note in the file. Without it, a year later nobody can prove the talk happened.
Step 2. Written warning. A signed form: facts with dates, the expectation and a deadline, the next step named. Add what support the company offers — it shows you tried to help.
Step 3. Final written warning or suspension. One sentence has to be there in writing: “The next incident may lead to termination.” The word “may” is important. It keeps the decision open, but the employee knows exactly where they stand.
Step 4. Termination review. Before the meeting HR reviews the file — and compares it with other files. Were the same rule and the same steps used for others in the same role? If one person was dismissed after three incidents and another got ten chances, that is a problem. For the document itself, see the termination letter template.
Step 1. Verbal warning: a private talk. The manager names three things — the standard, the facts and the fix. And “verbal” does not mean unrecorded: the manager writes a dated note in the file. Without it, a year later nobody can prove the talk happened.
Step 2. Written warning. A signed form: facts with dates, the expectation and a deadline, the next step named. Add what support the company offers — it shows you tried to help.
Step 3. Final written warning or suspension. One sentence has to be there in writing: “The next incident may lead to termination.” The word “may” is important. It keeps the decision open, but the employee knows exactly where they stand.
Step 4. Termination review. Before the meeting HR reviews the file — and compares it with other files. Were the same rule and the same steps used for others in the same role? If one person was dismissed after three incidents and another got ten chances, that is a problem. For the document itself, see the termination letter template.
What to say in the conversation. The script in my course has six lines, and the order matters. Here it is for a refusal:
“I want to talk about the weekly stock report.”
“On 9 May and 16 May I asked you for it in writing. Both times you answered that you were not going to do it.”
“Purchasing placed two orders without the stock numbers.”
“What is getting in the way?”
“From this Friday I need the report by 16:00 every week.”
“Please sign to show you received this. You can add your comments.”
The topic, the dated facts, the impact, a question, the expectation, the signature.
When can steps be skipped?
Not every case starts at step one. In the policy materials I use, offences are split into three levels: minor — communicate the standard, then an informal discussion; moderate — verbal, written and final warnings; serious — suspension, investigation, a dismissal hearing and dismissal. A first refusal usually sits in the first or second level. A refusal that puts people’s safety at risk, or one that comes with threats, belongs to the third.
For serious misconduct the order is: notify the employee of the allegation without delay, investigate quickly (the employee may be suspended with pay while this is done), then hold a hearing. The employee is told in writing what the meeting is about and what the possible outcome is, and may bring a colleague or a representative. Keep it confidential: until the facts are established, the person is entitled to the protection of their good name.
A policy line you can adapt: “[Company] may skip steps depending on the facts.” Whether you may actually skip them depends on your law and contracts.
For serious misconduct the order is: notify the employee of the allegation without delay, investigate quickly (the employee may be suspended with pay while this is done), then hold a hearing. The employee is told in writing what the meeting is about and what the possible outcome is, and may bring a colleague or a representative. Keep it confidential: until the facts are established, the person is entitled to the protection of their good name.
A policy line you can adapt: “[Company] may skip steps depending on the facts.” Whether you may actually skip them depends on your law and contracts.
Insubordination write-up: what goes into a written warning, with a sample
At iDeals in 2018 we had a formal Corrective Action Notice, so that dismissals followed rules and not moods. At the top — the name, the department, the date and the manager. Then the level: verbal, written or final warning, and the subject: a policy breach, performance, unacceptable behaviour or lateness. Then the previous corrective actions, a description of the gap and an improvement plan with measurable requirements, a line that everything would be monitored for the next month with the date of the interim review, and a direct statement that results had to improve at once, otherwise measures could go as far as ending the agreement. At the bottom — the employee’s comment and three signatures.
The lighter form from my course has nine required fields: employee, job, date, the standard, facts with dates, the prior step, the expectation, the next step and the review date — plus the support offered and a box for employee comments. Three things matter most: facts with dates, not words like “always refuses”; the prior step named, so the progression is visible; and the next step with a review date, so the employee knows the deadline.
The lighter form from my course has nine required fields: employee, job, date, the standard, facts with dates, the prior step, the expectation, the next step and the review date — plus the support offered and a box for employee comments. Three things matter most: facts with dates, not words like “always refuses”; the prior step named, so the progression is visible; and the next step with a review date, so the employee knows the deadline.
Seven mistakes managers and HR make
- Calling every “no” insubordination. Check the three conditions first.
- Reacting in public. The first step is a private talk.
- Not writing the note. A verbal warning is verbal in the room and written in the file.
- Labels instead of facts. “Bad attitude” and “always refuses” prove nothing. Dates and exact words do.
- No next step and no review date. The employee leaves the room without knowing what happens if it repeats.
- Different rules for different people. The file is checked against other files, not only against the rule.
- Skipping steps in anger — or promising steps in the policy and then not following them.
A refusal is almost always the visible end of a conflict that started earlier. If you want to work with the cause and not only with the paper — how conflicts escalate, how to run a difficult meeting, how to bring two sides back to the table — it is in our Conflict Resolution Course for Managers and HR.
